This just in!

I found a great post while visiting random sass. Lately I feel the pull to become more religious. (I used to be before. Now, not so much. It's a long story.) Anyways, the webmaster, sha, said something brilliant. She was referring to a conversation with a friend of hers:

being raised in a staunch christian family, homeschooled & going to christian private schools, he has declared himself "free" of the bondage of a belief in religion. to quote him, this is what he said the first day of his world religions class when the teacher asked each student to share their opinion/perception of religion:

religion is a crutch. and that's okay. everybody has crutches, everybody has vices. it might be drinking, drugs, sex or shoplifting. or it might be religion or "faith". fact is, it's a crutch that some people choose. granted it's the best crutch, but it's still a crutch.

i didn't respond because he knows we see things differently & respects the differences, but i imagine there will be more discussions on the topic.

for now, i'm sticking with my "crutch" because i know i'm lame without it.

(emphasis added)

That's what I've come to realize. I can't do without God. I wind up pathetic when I try to live otherwise.

Yum?

Sorry I haven't written in a while. It's election day here in Canada.

I voted in the advanced polls a week or so ago.

Now, I've heard of people being upset over the lack of worthwhile candidates. But I've never felt the urge to make a meal out of my ballot.

People--you have been warned. Do NOT eat your votes!!

Go Canada...

The English-language Federal leadership debate was on last night.

What did I learn?

I'm still rooting for the Liberals.

And Jack Layton has very nice teeth.

Funnily enough, I'm not the only one who noticed.

I'm not knocking him for smiling. I'm one of the most cheerful people you'll probably ever meet. But there's a time and a place for everything, and last night Jack looked like he was having a little too much fun.

I still haven't found what I'm looking for.

And sometimes I wonder what it is.

I'm still in an in-between, unemployed stage. Still seeking fulfillment. Taking time to observe life all around me in all of its incarnations.

I've thought about, and plan on spending a little more time offline. There were two days last week when I was on the internet for about eight hours. I applied for a job or two, but I didn't really accomplish anything. I didn't even work on my first love--writing. I just sort of...loligagged.

As I get older I become more and more aware of how precious time truly is.

I also realize that a part of me is afraid to be alone.

More than alone.

I remember a line from All I Really Want by Alanis Morissette: "Why are you so petrified of silence?"

Why am I?

Perhaps I fear accomplishing my destiny.

I can't do the simplest chores without being accompanied by the radio or TV. It's weird...Like I really am afraid of something.

Lately I've felt strong impulses to abandon my high-tech, internet-radio-television-hotmail-lovin' routine. When I was younger, before all of this, I amused myself in quieter, more fulfilling ways. I certainly wrote a lot more.

I think in the days to come, this is what I'll do...

Aside from the essentials--checking my email--I don't really need to be online. But I love to explore.

I think I'll try putting myself on a two-hour limit. Believe me. Compared with my usual time wasting, that's progress...

Profile: Emily Mills

As someone who dreams of being a writer, I enjoy hearing other people’s perspectives on the profession. Emily Mills is someone who has done more than dream. She has taken steps to turn her literary aspirations into reality. Her articles and video interviews can be viewed online. Currently Emily is honing her skills in Ryerson University’s post graduate journalism program. Recently I sent her a few questions…

What do you think makes a successful writer?
Persistence. Faith in your abilities. Curiosity - about lots of people, places and things happening in the world. The desire to improve your craft, at each stage of your 'career'. Lots of reading and no reservations about picking up a good dictionary. Willingness to do a lot of thinking - and working - through the process of what you want to say and how you want to say it. Trust in your gut... that it will take you where you need to go as a writer and that your instincts are usually right.

What would you be doing if you weren’t writing?
I do many things besides writing. When I’m not writing I’m still communicating. Via email. Via phone. By interacting with people in person. Lots of reading and going places and being with people to get ideas. And just to see what's going on in a life besides my own. In terms of work, I’d probably be doing PR, something related to the music industry or some kind of consulting between the underground communities ('visible minorities', youth, urban professionals in Canada) and the mainstream (government, big press, schools etc.).

What do you enjoy the most about writing?
It helps me to get things off my chest. To expose issues. To make sense of life on paper. To share information. To reflect. To offer my two cents to the mix.

What do you think is the most challenging thing about being a writer?
Knowing what's right... What's the focus of this story? Is that my opinion or the opinion of others? Did I tell the story the best way I could? Is my personal feeling too apparent in the story or too absent? Questions like that. The other biggest challenge is: how can I live off this writing gig?

Is there anything you don’t like about writing?
It’s very subjective. Certain things are supposed to be standard or expected, but I’ve had work critiqued as shitty and superb at the same time. Hard to make sense of it all. That’s why you've gotta know yourself and when you've done all that's needed and then trust your gut. Take advice and guidance, but in the end, you make the call. (Or if you plan to get paid, your editor does.)

Who or what would be your dream interview/story?
Can’t tell ya... I have a few stories I’d like to tell but I’m not ready to write them yet. You’ll know when I’m there. But it's a good idea for writers to dream and then, in time, to make their dreams a reality. It’s tough but I’m trusting that it's not unrealistic.

Where do you see your writing taking you? Would you like to write a book?
Again, I try not to advertise where I’m going. Partly because I’m still figuring it out. But also because sometimes it's better to just do it.

How would you like to be remembered, in terms of your career?
[That] sounds bit morbid since I don't need to be remembered - I’m right here! But I don't know... I guess as someone who was trying to move things in a different direction. To push the envelope. Not just in terms of what I choose to write but in terms of the environment in which people can communicate. I try to tell stories that seem so obvious yet not enough people bother to tell the stories at all. For example, my essay on interracial relationships attracted so much interest that I was getting an email a week from people wanting to read it. One of my undergrad professors wanted to nominate it for a university-wide essay award and the publisher of a women's anthology was all over it. To me, it wasn't anything ingenious. It was a unique piece but again, it was just a story nobody had told that way. I won't bother to explain the [employment] environment stuff, but suffice to say, there is a lot of work that needs to be done to get young black writers paid. And in the mix called the Canadian media.

Jesus Walks

I don't write about music as much as I would like. It moves me. It soothes me. And if I actually could summon enough patience and discipline, I'd probably be pursuing a career.

Last night I heard something that I never thought I would. Jesus Walks by Kanye West. In the last verse, he says,"They say you can rap about anything except for Jesus/That means guns, sex, lies, video tapes..."

It's true and I'm tired of it.

I don't think people talk about God nearly as much as they should. I'm not thinking of Him in a preachy, patronizing context. But as a real entity in their lives. A concept that they struggle with. Or a deity they revere.

ETA: I should point out that it's not a tender gospel track. But hopefully it'll get some people talking. And thinking.

So...In this age of pimps and afterparties...Thank you, Kanye, for rapping about something that actually matters.

Knocked Up?

Me neither. But that doesn't stop me from recommending the book. It's by Rebecca Eckler, a Canadian journalist. I thought it was a lot of fun--a Bridget Jones-style romp through the author's pregnancy, from after conception until after the baby's birth.

I almost didn't bother reading it. But the title caught my eye as I was leaving the library.

It's refreshing, honest, and a great read. Consider Knocked Up the diary of your best girlfriend, sharing her pregnancy angst. Overall, well done.