Sunday, September 03, 2006

Not Alone

Recently I confessed to being an adultescent. I have tried and failed more than once to obtain genuine adult status.

I do not care to share the details of my latest failure. Although for me, it was huge. And heartbreaking.

I feel as though there is only so much of me left. My adult life seems to consist of little more than dreams deferred or destroyed.

There is only one way that I know out.

An aunt of mine says I need "Divine intervention". This was not said in jest or as a cliche. And though I know she spoke the truth, I cannot help feeling 1000 shades of stupid.

We human beings are so ego-driven, it's pathetic. I hate that I keep having to return to God whenever I need help, begging, like a child. Somehow I feel so humiliated.

And yet also, I find myself relieved. None of us was meant to share the burdens of this life alone.

There is only one way out from where I am. And God holds the key.

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